No Strings

2017 is coming to an end soon. It has been one crazy ride. I met new people. Friends became strangers. Strangers became friends. Friends became family. Lover turned out to be an abuser. I found comfort in the most unexpected place. These past few months has taught me a lot about the people around me and all these lessons made me wiser. I've made so many mistakes throughout the year. I've made decisions I regret till day. I've meet people who I wished I didn't meet. But, all these moments made me for who I am today.

I've learnt that settling for anything is not good. Settling down for the first thing you get, is not always the best for you. It could bring more harm than good. It is never right to settle for the first guy that walks into your life because then you wouldn't explore and mingle around. There is always a right guy out there for you but you got to find that one and settling down for the first guy that walks into your life would not make it happen.

Liking him is never tough because his laugh and smile will draw you to him.

Anything. You will do anything just to see his smile again.

You both are very similar yet different and this attraction is the fuel for your love.

You will think this love will never die.

You will lie to your family about him.

He's the one. He's my type.

But deep down you know, he's the closest you can get.

This is settling.

So why do we keep going back to that one particular guy? Till now, I don't have an answer for that. It could be because that guy knows everything about you and does things that would attract you towards him more. But my question here is, do you know him? What are you both expecting from each other? Are you both looking for a relationship or is it just a fling?

If you knew it was just a fling, why did you keep going back to him?

If you knew it wasn't serious, why did you make him your priority?

If you knew there were no strings, why were you breaking it?

You knew all these but you fell for him without realizing.

Now you are trying to save yourself from a heartbreak.

You made him your world.

You made him your everything.

This is you hoping, he would do the same for you.

Go with the flow. Do not have any expectations, hopes or ignore him because you think that is the best. Just be you and try not to please him all the time. Don't make him your priority if he doesn't do the same for you. If he gives you 10% of his time, give him back just as much as he gives you. You got to learn to love yourself and be independent first before anything else. Another person to love you, is an amazing feeling but that love should be true and honest.

The smile that took my breath away

Oh my love, We sat together at a table for two And we ate ice cream together. I found out that you hated blue, And I liked anything white, Because that color displayed hope. You had to ask for a bowl of cherries. and say: I'm eating you, Cherry! I've never been very good at making jokes, But you seemed to laugh at everyone. And, Oh, my love, how happy that made me. My love, I'm about 40 pounds heavier that most girls, And that has always made me feel conscious, So i ordered only one scoop of chocolate ice cream. You had to leave after two hours, And i stared at you outside the ice cream parlor. You looked at me with a hidden smile. And My Love, you hugged me. I understood how teddy bears felt when they received hugs, Like you're special, And the person hugging you cares about you a lot. Thank you, Cherry, you said. You kissed my cheek. But my love, Is it weird that I've been holding my che...

Still confused

But my love, I've never been more confused. Why are you acting this way around me? Nevertheless, I do not care. Because the light's back in your eyes, You smile more now, You talk to your friends and amends have been made. You even introduced me to them, saying : Guys, this is Cherry, my berry. I looked at you, I'm not anyone's berry, Austin, i said, smirking. You laughed an arm around my shoulder. We both know that's not true, you said. Oh my love, My heart's beating fast all the time now, and if it is even possible, I think i love you even more , now that i am someone in your life

Tibi Magno Cum Amor

But my love, You don't know how much i missed you. The immature, carefree version of you. You used to laugh at everything and smirk at inappropriate jokes. Now you're just there. The distance between you and your friends goes for miles and miles. You only smile from time to time, Yet it is never genuine. But my love, You're like faded, ink blotched pages. The story's there, but it's unreadable. The adventure's still there, yet it's practically a blob on black ink. Just so you know my love, I think i loved you at your best ( when you were happy ) But i'm a hundred percent sure, That my love for you has done nothing but amplified ( when you become sad ). Oh, my love. I'll say thus a hundred times ( in my head of course ). I'm in love with your quirks and your flaws. I'm in love with your smile and your tears. I'm in love with your dark brown eyes and your frown. I'm in love with your...

So Kiss Me

But my love, You are stubborn and very stupid. You do not want to accept the truth, Because you know that it will hurt you. But I tried telling you the truth, The reality you can't just keep avoiding like that. Your relationship with HER fell from cloud nine to the ground And became as flat as a pancake. She smiles to other guys. She laughs at their jokes. She flutters her eyelashes. She demands from you. And when you protest, She shuts you up with a kiss. But my love, I beg you to listen to me. Love is free, But you are as free as a caged bird. I tried talking to you, But all you said was : Shut up woman! Please accept the truth, Before your heart gets broken. Because my love, I never see you smile anymore, And that's something no one should Ever Have to suffer through. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I wrote this while listening to KISS YOU by the THE FRAY ( Cover by Jason W...

I'm only human

When I was little, I always thought of life as a fairy tail, where I'd be living in a pink-colored world; where everything was rainbow, butterflies, happiness and perfection. Everybody was happy; everybody was nice and kind to everyone else. Now, as I grow up, I realize, as a matter of fact, that life is not even close to this. I realize that life isn't perfect and that nobody is perfect. That perfection, in this world is a myth. Sometimes, the weirdest things happen at the m ost unexpected places and moments. You find out that there's not only happiness, joy and kindness in this world, but pain, harshness and tears. It also came down to me, that you can get hurt; you can cry and you can get your heart broken a million times, but that's not what matters the most. What really matters is the reaction you decide to have. Whether you decide to let pain that you're feeling consume you and tear you apart, or, decide to let that pain strengthen you, to let it teach you le...

There's no easy days

"I'm sorry, sweetheart. I'm afraid we're going to have to put her down." Hearing those words echo in my ear, I fall to the filthy ground. The vet looks down at me with concerning eyes, and a face full of pity. My heart drops to my stomach, and my hands start to shake. I was so hopeful, so sure she would be okay. "A-are you sure? I mean, there has to be something-" I stuttered. "I'm so sorry, Lucy. I know tho sis going to be hard. But do you really want her to suffer?" The vet said quietly. "I mean if she remained alive, her leg would cause her pain for the res of her life. She would have to be taken to expensive horse therapies and operations. and at the end of the day, she still would never race again. And all that work you have put into her…" But what about all the work I already put into her? I've stood by my horse, Easy Days, since she was a foal. I bottle-fed her when her mother passed away. i trained he...

Surprises!

Surprises sometimes are very good as they can cheer up someone even with a small surprise visit or buying them something small like a flower or chocolates. It depends on the certain individual on what they want. If I would want someone to surprise me, a bouquet of roses or lilies would definitely make my day. Well, I believe the surprise I and my friends did for Kiran made her day and most probably she might forget them! A person can get happy and sad very fast and it all depends on whose doing it. I believe it made her day and the photos that were taken would always remind her about the surprise we did for her. Here are some pictures of our surprise and also my friends : The birthday girl with a beautiful smile is Kiran! Yummy birthday cake! Chocolate Moist Cake :) This beautiful person is Ranghita Laxmi :) This pretty girl is Lahvanya! This good looking guy is Haari ;) This handsome guy is ...

Empty

Hi there. Its been sometime since i wrote anything here. There had been this emptiness in me that i didn't know how to fill them up. Feels like the emptiness won over whatever I had built. But then i realized, I just needed to overcome the fear in me. And I did. This one goes to the emptiness i felt once. Emptiness was looking at yourself in the mirror and acknowledging that you will never be society's definition of perfect. You walk around like a corpse, feeling your soul fade away every second, and there is nothing to do about it. There is nothing you want to do about it. Emptiness tasted like a gum that has lost it's taste. Yet you keep on chewing because you're too lazy to spit it out and take another one. Your mouth is disgusted by the taste, and you are torturing the muscle in your stomach by faking the though of eating. You keep on chewing, just for the sake of it. Emptiness sounds like your parents talking about your grades, and how they need to g...

Habits Of A Wanderer

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